Chapter 60:

My Circle is Making our Big Debut.

My Dad is an Otaku, My Mom is a Fujoshi, and I Wish I Was Dead


"Booth 138...Kuri-sama?"

"Yup!" Ayame cracks a big smile as she stands in front of a very stressed-looking woman sitting at the registration tables just inside the entrance to the convention center. On either side of us, entire groups of people are signing in- they must be here to sell doujinshi too. A lot of them look like the stereotypical otaku- fat, greasy, hunchbacked, unwashed, terrible fashion sense- but there are some that look surprisingly normal, and there are some women here. That's the most surprising part to me. I figured that any woman not named Ayame Shiritori wouldn't be caught dead at the Perverted Otaku Art Sales Convention, but I've seen a few, and they're not bad-looking, either.

Maybe I was the one who had the wrong idea about otaku...yeah, right.

The reception lady picks up a sheet of paper and then stares at it for a few seconds. "Booth 138. Circle name: Nakamachi Tomodachi. That's your group, I take it?"

"Yup!" Ayame exclaims. "We're coming all the way from Chiba!"

"Kuri-sama, may I see a form of ID?"

"Huh? What for?" Despite her puzzled reaction, Ayame takes out her student ID and shows it to the lady at the desk, who checks it.

"Thank you very much." She hands the card back to Ayame. "And the others?"

I step forward. "My name's Haru-"

Before I can finish, Ayame steps in front of me. "That's Number Two, and behind him are Number Three and Number Four."

"Wha-" I'm more peeved that she's still using those names that make us sound like low-rent toku villains from the mid-80s than that she interrupted me. "I was talking, you-"

Before I can react, Ayame grabs me with a surprisingly strong pincer right on the shoulder blade and drags me to the side. "We don't use real names here. Nobody does," she hisses with a rare look of seriousness on her face.

"I get it, just let go of me!"

"Ah! Sorry!" She immediately drops her hand off my shoulder and starts to turn a bit pink. "I was worried...there have been a few instances where artists have inadvertently revealed their real names and been harassed because of it. That's why it's important to keep your creative life separate from your personal life. Not everyone's going to be a fan of you, so you need to keep your personal details to yourself if you don't want to deal with trouble."

No one would bother enough to harass the members of a third-rate doujin circle, but I don't say that out loud. "The only people who use fake names are the ones that have something to hide."

Ayame puffs out one of her cheeks. "Just go along with it."

"Okay. Fine." When in Rome, or whatever. "But next time let me pick my pen name before you spring it on me."

"Ma'am, are you finished?" The lady at the desk gives us a look of concern after seeing our whispered conversation, and I notice several people in line behind us staring at us in a similar way.

"Sorry, coming!" Ayame bounds back over to the table. "Anyways, this is Number Two, like I mentioned."

"Yup, that's me..." I don't have the energy to object or come up with a better name on the spot.

"And these are Number Three and Four in the back."

Suzuran and Takeno-senpai nod.

"Everything's been prepaid, so here are your wristbands." She holds up four light blue wristbands held together with snaps, which we take, putting on. "Table 138 is in Conference Room W5. Take two rights down the hallway and it'll be the third door on the left. Next!"

The crowd gathered at the registration desk is already massive. If that's just vendors (which I suspect it is), then how many people will be here today? Yes, I know Comiket is a massive event that draws people from all over the world to it, but I still didn't understand just how many people that must mean until I saw the lines for registration.

"All right!" Ayame chirps as we gather our supplies up. "Ready to head to the booth?"

"I think you're forgetting something," I sigh.

"Oh yeah, our circle cheer."

"No, you idiot, my sister."

"Oh, sorry. Ehehe~"

We make our way back towards the large awning at the very front of the building, where my sister and Asahi are standing by a support column. Maebara is still out of it.

"You're sure your friend's okay, right?" I ask Kaede as our two groups meet back up.

"Positive." She doesn't look the slightest bit worried, so it's probably fine.

"Okay. We're going inside, but the doors don't open to the public until 10. Can you guys find something to do until then? Don't get too far away from us."

"We can do that."

"Also, I'll check in with you about every hour, so be on the lookout for that."

"Gotcha."

"What a loving brother..." Asahi, standing near Kaede, half-smirks.

"Oh, be quiet. I wasn't talking to you."

Asahi grins back at me. I like her less and less by the minute.

We bid our goodbyes and head out. The halls of Big Sight are full of people, either heading to their assigned booths just like us or stopping to make last-second preparations. The closer we get to the hallway with the conference room, the louder the murmurs in the background grow, and the steady stream of people turns into a torrent.

As we pass by a set of bathrooms, Ayame suddenly stops, with the rest of us quickly following her. She turns around with a big smile on her face. "Suzucchi, come with me for a second."

"A-A-Ayame-san?" Suzuran's face flushes pink as she sees my childhood friend approach, and she takes a step back, but she's no match for Ayame, who grabs her by the arm and practically drags her into the women's bathroom, leaving Takeno-senpai and I standing in the middle of the hallway, holding our supplies.

I have a bad feeling about what's coming next.

A few minutes later, Ayame comes waltzing out of the bathroom, proudly dragging Suzuran along by the arm...what is that she's got on?

Oh, God.

Immediately, I get up in Ayame's face, hissing, "What do you think you're doing to Suzuran?!"

"Helping her put on her bunny suit- Ow!"

As she rubs the spot on her forehead where I flicked it, I grumble, "It was a rhetorical question, moron!"

Poor Suzuran. She's trying, in vain, to cover up, frantically holding onto the sign she's carrying, even though her shoulders and entire upper back are visible in that ridiculous, skimpy outfit. It makes her already large breasts seem even larger, if that can be believed. Meanwhile, there's a pair of rabbit ears on her head, and her legs are covered in fishnets...it does make her look really good...I admit, she's cute...but there's a more pressing issue.

"Go back and make her take that off! Right now!" I snap at Ayame.

"You just don't get it, do you, Baka-Haru?" Ayame shrugs her shoulders with a proud expression. "What do otaku like? Cuteness, obviously. So if we have a really cute girl like her advertising our doujins, we'll sell better!"

My head is starting to hurt. I should have guessed Ayame would come up with some sort of ridiculous scheme, but this is crossing a line, even for her. "Did you ask her if she wanted to wear that costume?"

"Of course I did! Like fifteen times."

"She obviously doesn't want to, so make her take it off, right now!"

"D-d-don't worry about me, Kouga-san..." Suddenly, we're interrupted by Suzuran's breathy, frail voice. She's still clinging onto the sign for dear life, and she's a nice shade of rosy pink, but there's some determination in her eyes. "I agreed to this...so I-I-I-I've g-g-got to see it through until t-t-t-the end..."

"Thanks, Suzucchi!" Ayame exclaims, giving Suzuran a pat on the head. Almost immediately, the other girl yelps in surprise. "I knew you'd have my back."

You have got to be kidding me.

Beside me, my captain is staring right straight ahead at the two girls, not moving. As they turn around to head to our booth, he still hasn't moved.

"Oi. Earth to Takeno-senpai. Are you there?" I wave my hand in front of his face, and suddenly he jolts to attention.

"Oh, sorry, Kouga. I was spacing out for a second there."

"That's putting it mildly."

"I wasn't expecting Suzuran to do something so...bold."

"It wasn't her idea."

"She said she agreed to it."

"Do you really think she would choose to wear a ridiculous costume like that out of her own free will?"

Takeno-senpai is silent for a second as we walk down the hall, then he responds. "When I first met her, I wouldn't have thought so...but I've realized that there are a lot of hidden sides to people."

I sigh as we enter conference room W-5. These people are all idiots. I'm surrounded by a bunch of idiots. And no, being surrounded by idiots does not mean I'm also an idiot. That's something that stupid people say to cheer themselves up.

Never mind. Let's get back to the story.

The conference room is huge. The roof has to be three stories high, and there are what seems like a hundred tables, all covered in blue plastic tablecloths, lined up in a snake-like, efficient pattern. Everywhere I look, there's groups of people- some are arranging things on their tables, some are setting up banners and posters, and others are making their way toward the tables like we are.

I wonder how hard everyone else here worked? Did they stay up late at night, like Ayame and I, editing and drawing? Were they trying to get their doujins perfect? Did they have professional help, or were they amateurs just like us, making fan works because they genuinely loved their favorite series? Did they have falling-outs in the middle of their creative process, too?

It may look like I have nothing in common with all the weird people in this conference room, but I do, a little bit. I gave my time and effort to make our doujinshi a success, just like everyone else here.

It makes me want to check out their- What am I saying? Of course I'm not gonna touch any of that weird otaku crap! I'm only here due to obligation! Obligation! That is IT! Got it?

"Booth 138! We're here!" Ayame crows. Sure enough, right in front of us, on a nondescript table with a blue cloth over it, just like the rest, three piles of thin booklets sit. I'm not sure what the other two are, but I recognize the one I edited instantly.

Hesitantly, I pick it up and thumb through the pages. It's the same artwork that I looked at on a tablet and on sheets of ordinary printer paper, but it's printed on professional quality paper. If it wasn't for the poor artwork, I would have believed it was an actual published manga for a second.

"Don't you just love publishing houses with delivery?" Ayame chirps as she unloads her stuff.

With four of us working, the banners and signs on our booth go up quicker than expected. Surprisingly, Suzuran's outfit didn't get all the attention from leering perverts that I was fearing it would get. Occasionally some guy walking by our table will give her a quick look and I'll shoot him a death glare in return, but there are tons of other people in crazy costumes walking around, too. Ayame's idea wasn't that outlandish, come to think about it, but poor Suzuran. She still doesn't look 100% comfortable in the bunny suit.

Ayame fastens one last ziptie, and we step back to admire our handiwork. Takeno-senpai's pricing sign is neatly typed, telling the titles and prices of each doujin in large font. The banner is...not. Ayame drew it, and it's full of flashy colors and our circle name in an almost unreadable font that looks like it's from one of those early 2000s kids' anime that were made to sell cheap plastic toys.

...Ugh. She even drew "Kuri-chan and her Three Underlings". We look like bad toku villains, too.

"So, what do you think?" Ayame asks after we've looked at the banner hanging off the table for a few seconds.

"I-i-it's certainly...flashy." Suzuran nods.

I sigh and shake my head. "Don't you think we should have had some input into the design?"

"I wanted to surprise you," Ayame replies.

"You did. Just not in the way I was expecting."

"It's 9:15." Takeno-senpai, standing next to me, glances down at his watch. "We have some time to spare. Did you want to get anything else done before the gates open?"

Ayame's reaction comes immediately. "I wanted to walk around and see the rest of the convention! What about everyone else?"

"Not me. We can do that any time today. I need to take a break before everything starts." Right on cue, I stifle a yawn.

"Aww, but it's better seeing everything before everyone gets here, so you don't have to deal with crowds." Ayame pouts a bit, flicking her eyes to the side.

"Look around you, it's already crowded."

"It'll get worse!" Ayame says with a big smile on her face.

Ugh. Can't wait.

"Seriously, you don't want to come with me? It'll be boring all by myself..." Ayame balances on one foot as she continues to guilt-trip me into being her personal chaperone.

"Ask Suzuran or Takeno-senpai."

"We need someone to watch the booth, and I'm in charge of the money." Takeno-senpai's response comes immediately.

"Y-you told me to hold the sign..." So is Suzuran's.

Ayame's brow furrows as all three of her brain cells launch into deep thought. "Then that leaves you, Haru-kun!" she says with a big smile on her face.

"No."

"Please?"

Aw, crap. Here come the puppy-dog eyes. I'm not gonna fall for it, I'm not gonna fall for it, I'm not gonna let her yank me around...

"Pleeeeeeeeease?"

"All right, fine."

She got me, and I was powerless to stop her.

Steward McOy
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